Down the Toilet...

You ever laugh at something that didn't actually happen? You know...you ALMOST do something and just the mere thought of that thing makes you start laughing out loud.

Well that happened to me a few weeks ago at work. I went into the kitchen to fill up my water bottle and wasn't paying attention to where I was going really. I almost walked into the refrigerator door. Instead, at the last second I did one of those Crouching-Tiger shoulder pivots and just missed it. I kept thinking to myself, Wow, I really almost smacked right into the fridge, thank God no one was in there. And then the more I thought about it I kept thinking about how funny it must've looked like. I started to break into a smile and then what Kathy Griffin once called "the church giggles"- where you are trying desperately to suppress laughter at an inappropriate time and then it makes you laugh harder. Our office already sounds like a tomb and I'm sitting at my desk trying to breath out the laughs without drawing attention to myself.

The same sort of thing happened again today at work. I was in the bathroom and used my foot to flush the toilet. Now, another reason I love this job is their dress-code (and chiefly the fact that they don't really have one) so I usually wear jeans, plain shirt (usually a sweater too because somehow my particular section of the office feels like it's in a constant state of frigidity), and a pair of slip-ons that kind of look like the ones Cinderella used in the beginning of the movie when she was still a servant (you remember that?)

Anyway, as I pushed the lever down with my foot my shoe shifted and I had to kick it back to the floor, just barely missing the toilet. As relieved as I was, I couldn't help but start smiling. What the hell would I have done if I had knocked my own shoe into the toilet? I pictured myself trying to fish it out in the least revolting way and then squishing nonchalantly back, hoping no one would ask me why there were puddles leading to my desk. Or instead I'd just walk around with one shoe the rest of the day and count the number of odd looks I'd get. You see the comedic situations that could possibly ensue?

Oh well, hope that didn't gross anyone out (or at least you, Hill and Jessica--seems my fan base has doubled).

More hilarity/insight to follow tomorrow...