Jeez, I was just rereading what I had written back on Monday to realize where my story left off, and was taken aback by all my typos. For shame, me! What would other half-assed-barely legitimate-former English teachers like you say? I apologize to the actual English teachers out there for my glaring inaccuracies. Anyway, let me bang the rest of this story out...
So there I was, on the line, with no looking back. As we climbed onto the bus and found some seats, the same guy with the elaborate make-up stood up to tell us the rules.
"Please do not touch the monsters as they are not allowed to touch you.." I heard the word "monster" and I suddenly slipped down into my seat, shaking. I know this probably sounds a little melodramatic, but I couldn't help my reaction. I was silent for the whole 45 seconds we were on the bus, and as we started to disembark I briefly considered making a run to the nearest bar to wait for the rest, calling my apologies out over my shoulder. Instead, I knew I was in it. I'd have no choice but to go forward.
Thankfully, the girls were great about calming me down, although I had a slight panic when they led me over to sign a waiver. Yeah, a waiver!? I barely put my pen to the paper, suddenly terrified. Carly led me back towards the line, and as we waited to get in I noticed a girl of about 7 or 8 coming out of the attraction. She was talking excitedly to her family members or friends, and seemed overall unharmed.
I suddenly jolted back in my memories, recalling the time my sisters and I were in Magic Kingdom the last time and they were dragging me onto the Haunted Mansion ride. I was quite literally pitching a fit, when they beseeched the man at the door of the ride to simply tell me it was ok, and not that scary. He looked us over, with his pale made-up face, and said in his spookiest voice, "I wouldn't go in there, if I were yoooou." Thanks alot, Casper. Way to earn that theater internship and complimentary Disney stock.
I was still freaking out, until we noticed several kids, much younger than I, talking about how they had been on the Haunted Mansion ride a bunch of times. Suddenly, one of my sisters turned to me and said, "Really? These kids could be on an elementary school trip and YOU'RE freaking out?" That shut me up. Save a few whimpers, anyway.
I felt exactly as foolish then as I did now on that line. Except I was much older. And the kids looked even younger. I tried to compose myself, but the characters, noticing my fidgety hands and quick screams, found in me an ideal patron: gullible, blind, and already a barrel full of a fear. As we finally made our way into the actual penitentiary, I swear I could hear them whispering to each other in their headsets...
"Glasses, ponytail, and blue sweatshirt. Go go go!" They loved to get right in my ear, breathe on my neck, and wait for me to turn the corner before popping out. Finally as we headed for the last section, the others reminded me to simply avoid eye contact, and then they'd leave you alone. I was glad to listen to this advice, as it did keep them from attacking me full force, as they had on the other three sections.
When we finally made it out, I screamed a sigh of relief. Later on as we were making our way back, the braver and more experienced haunted-house visitors gave their critique.
"That was ok. But if you thought that was scary, you don't want to go to Field of Screams..." You're right, I really don't. I was glad I didn't totally wuss out and make myself an even bigger coward in front of the group. But I'll also be happy to never go to another one of those things again....Which way to the Spinning Teacups and Flight of Peter Pan??
No comments:
Post a Comment