Holy hell, I'm finally back in Jersey. I realize I was absent the past TWO days but what can I say, the holidays insist upon it. Still it was glad to see an old friend once more (at Drag Queen Bingo...yep) so it was worth it.
But I do hate leaving things unfinished and so I give you my final Christmas story...
A few years after the Super Van City incident or the Magic Diary debacle I felt I had outgrown alot of my childish wants. I wasn't looking for just toys anymore, I was looking into investing....into toys. My neighbor friend and I found ourselves beginning to collect and research those cute beanie creatures known as Beanie Babies. We had been given them by our families but when we realized that people were actually collecting them we set to work to see what our current ones were worth. Soon we were joining the masses in every greeting card store, obsessively hunting and buying every $5 animal we could, carefully following the guide of which were collectible and which were not. One day we walked into Intrinsic, a hippie head shop (in the mall, of all places), and in their very back EVEN they had a display full of floppy animals, some even encased for protection of their value: a few of the rabbits and a Garcia, the tied-dyed 60s bear- shocker.
It was around this time that my sister Hill was beginning to shop around for colleges to attend, and so on one trip the whole family decided to go. On one stop in Savannah we were walking around and found a collectibles store. We meandered in, looking at all the toys from bygone years and happened upon a display of Beanie Babies. I suddenly piped in like an expert and began to explain to my fellow family members about which ones were worth anything. I must've impressed them enough because they actually not only withstood my blathering but even incited questions for me to answer.
Eventually the months passed and so did the fever for Beanie Baby mania. I still was happy to read about which were collectible but for the most part I could feel my interest beginning to wain, just, as it happens, in time for Christmas. Months prior I had still been all set for nothing but Beanie Babies, so my mother didn't really even have to bother asking what I wanted for Christmas.
The big day came and after we all had opened several gifts my mother handed me another one. It was a Beanie baby. I plastered my fail-safe smile, the same one I had donned all those previous years, and was told that the rest of my new "collection" was everywhere in the room, so I'd have to go and find them. To my mother it was a cute scavenger-hunt idea, but for me, it was the final humiliation to walk around and fain excitement as I plucked each animal from behind pillows or behind sofas. Finally, my family noticed my lack of enthusiasm and asked the loaded question- "what's wrong?"
I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe I had done it AGAIN! Why do these obsessions I have disappear the instant I have it in my hands. I felt terrible but thankfully I didn't have to say anything. My family members have been through this ringer a few time now, and so my sisters chimed in, "she doesn't LIKE them anymore!" My mother, also a veteran to this war, simply smiled, rolled her eyes, and said, "Oh..oh well."
I felt like a total ass, but I was grateful my family could make light of it and rather than crucify me angrily every year henceforth about my fickle Christmases, merely crucify me with jokes and quips. I hope I have grown out of this phase...after 20-something years. But you never know. "Oh, did I say I WANTED an iPad?....ummmmm"
Anyway, hope you enjoyed my tour of the Gifts of Christmas Passed, and hope you have a great holiday, full of embarrassing tales and horror stories about gifts, family, and travel. I'll be back to relate mine sometime next week. Till then, Merry F-ing Christmas everyone!
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